If Heels Could Talk: The Cockpit Situation

This edition of the series ‘If heels could talk; stories from the road’ is in honor of my youngest travel buddy! This time, a story from a trip we took three years ago. It was December 2016 and my 5-year old niece, M, was coming from London to Edinburgh with me for Christmas holidays. 

the flight

Before we boarded in London, we partook in all the holiday festivities at the airport. We pet the animals, read books, ate snacks, went to the toilet 34 times, and played games (you know the drill if you’ve travelled with kids). We boarded the EasyJet flight from Gatwick to Edinburgh and settled in. As it was her first time flying since she was a baby, we got to talking about pilots and flying and I asked my niece if she’d like to meet the pilot and get a picture in the cockpit once we landed. Of course she said yes!

As the sharp and cool aunty that I am, as we got off the plane, I walked up, stood outside the cockpit and asked the pilots if they would please do me a huge favor and allow my niece her first picture in a cockpit. They were only happy to oblige. We got our picture and went on our merry way. My niece was excited to share the experience with classmates after the holidays via her writing assignment.

the return flight

5 days later, it was time to get her back to London and off we went! In flight this time we dealt with a queasy belly during take off, and my niece was focused on making up conversations between her juice box and cookies (imagination on another level) while also asking me about a boyfriend.

As we got off the plane, I was focused on getting all our bags (and two of us frankly) off the plane in one piece. On the other hand, M was focused on skipping down the aisle. I told her to walk in front of me while I stumbled behind, laden with bags (+her Christmas gifts).

On every plane you get to the point where you either walk straight into the cockpit, or you turn left and disembark from the plane. Well, M, skipped right into the cockpit. The flight attendants were shocked, I was shocked, and I stumbled into the cockpit behind her like the ‘responsible’ guardian that I am.

the flip

Turns out, it wasn’t a mistake. She entered the cockpit and looked at both pilots and asked in a clear voice. ‘Hello, would you like a picture with me?’ They were taken aback but they recovered quickly and said it would be an honor. One of the pilots immediately got up, asked her to sit, and handed her his hat to wear.

Frazzled, I found my phone, got the picture (actually only got one good picture), chatted with the pilots a bit and went on our way. This time, we really got off the plane!

I’m certain those pilots were frazzled because they’re usually asked to do a favor, and no one ever asks from the position of being ‘the prize.’ I considered scolding my niece on how she should have let me know, or asked the flight attendants for permission but I decided to sit with my thoughts first.

We raise our kids to be respectful and to be sure of their place in this world. To know when to ask for permission but to also know when to set the tone i.e. be the thermostat vs the thermometer. While being ‘aunty’ I had set the tone by showing her she could get in that cockpit, see the controls, and talk to the pilots. I always tell her to ‘use her words’ instead of pouting, or throwing tantrums. ‘Use your words’ with kindness but with certainty and ask for what you want/need. She may not get what she wants, the world may not agree, but her words and perspectives matter.

pondering

She did that, yet I was frazzled because I still didn’t expect it. She did ask for permission but she did not make herself small in the way that she asked. The truth is that I don’t always take the advice I give my niece, I don’t always use my voice as much as I could, and in certain situations where I should set the tone, I shrink back.

Kids say the darndest things, but kids are very often amazing teachers and reminders of our own self-limiting thoughts and behaviors. Thank you, M, for reminding me that I am the prize, to remember that there’s a time to ask permission, and there are times to seek permission later. Happy 8^th birthday (her birthday was yesterday, October 13)!

How would you have reacted? Have you had a child, niece, God son or daughter do something that throws you off or make you question your own behaviors? I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments section below!

If you’re new around here, thank you for reading! I started this series two years ago where I share real stories from my travels. If my shoes could talk, they would have lots to say and this series brings some of those stories to life. I don’t just share stories though, I share lessons and anecdotes. So these stories are for all of us! I’ve shared about leaving a friend at an airport in a different country, having lunch with hostage negotiators, and being fined $400 for an apple in New Zealand amongst others. Click here to catch up on all those stories.

Till Next Week,

Dee (Ms. Heels)

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